Mourning Routine:

I wake up: I feel guilty that I didn’t wake up earlier: I feel guilty that I didn’t go to sleep earlier: I feel guilty that now I’m late and I can’t make breakfast: I feel guilty that I haven’t eaten a proper breakfast in 3 years.

I drink a Red Bull: I feel guilty that I drink Red Bull: I feel guilty that I need caffeine: I feel guilty that I can’t just drink water: I feel guilty that RedBull costs $3: I feel guilty that I’m not spending my money to pay off debt:  I feel guilty that I have debt. 

I start to wash my face: I feel guilty I don’t wash my face more: I feel guilty I stopped my skincare routine: I feel guilty I have acne.

I bend over and feel my back pain: I feel guilty I have back pain: I feel guilty I don’t exercise more: I feel guilty I’ve gained weight.

I throw water on my face: I drop some on the floor: I feel guilty for wetting the floor: I feel guilty for feeling guilty for wetting the floor.

I feel guilty for feeling guilt.